


5 Things Maria Wishes She Didn't Notice the Morning After

by kiss_me_cassie



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Drunken Stumble, Excessive Drinking, F/M, Fluff, Innuendo, Sharing a Bed, but not really, shippy if you want it to be
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-25
Updated: 2016-07-25
Packaged: 2018-07-26 14:01:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 614
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7576651
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kiss_me_cassie/pseuds/kiss_me_cassie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Damn Stark and his thousand dollar whiskey which went down smoother than… well, anything she'd ever had before.</p>
            </blockquote>





	5 Things Maria Wishes She Didn't Notice the Morning After

**Author's Note:**

> While on vacation, we drove by a street named Stark Hill. And if you think I could could pass that up, you're crazy. (Plus, I had another 4 hours stuck in the car. What else was I supposed to do with the time?)

Despite a pounding headache caused by too much whiskey from the night before, Maria clearly noted three things upon waking.

1\. The light in the room was blazingly bright (Oh God, why was it so bright?)  
2\. Someone was sharply kicking her leg (And dammit, if they wanted to keep their foot attached to the rest of their body, they'd better stop ASAP.)   
3\. Presumably the same someone was also fervently whispering her name (The sound grated in her ears and made her grimace.)

Eyes still barely cracked, she carefully turned her head on the silk-encased pillow where it lay and found Tony Stark staring at her with a desperate look.

"Stark?" she croaked, her aching head having trouble catching up with what she was seeing.

He rolled his eyes. "Yes. Who else would it be?"

"I don't know. I'm barely…" She gently shook her head, trying to clear it. That's when the fourth and fifth things registered. 

4\. She was in a bed, covered from the neck down by silk sheets (Wow, they felt great. She should get some silk sheets of her own.)  
5\. Tony Stark was in the bed with her (Just how much had she drank last night?)

"What am I doing here? What are _you_ doing here?"

He ignored her questions and asked one of his own. "Are you wearing anything under there?"

She peaked beneath her half of the sheet. 

"Panties on, no bra," she reported. "You?"

"Commando all the way," he confessed. "Do you think we --"

"No."

"That's it? Just no?"

"I'm still wearing my underwear."

"Well, maybe, you know," he said, waving his hand in the general area of his groin.

"No," she repeated firmly, although she wasn't 100% sure. 

"Really? I kinda feel like maybe you did."

Damn Stark and his thousand dollar whiskey which went down smoother than… well, anything she'd ever had before. She ran her tongue experimentally over her teeth. They were disgustingly fuzzy and gross from all of the whiskey, but she couldn't detect the taste or feel or anything else. 

"No, I -- _we_ \-- most definitely did not."

He looked relieved, but still said with one of his infernal smirks, "Probably for the best. We'd both want to be fully conscious when it finally happens."

"Uh huh," she said dismissively. If she had her way, it would never happen. Or, well, probably never happen. Her love life was suffering from a long dry spell. If she got desperate enough, anything was possible. Unlikely, but possible.

Ignoring her aching head, she sat up all the way, tugging the sheet securely up around her armpits as she did. Who cared if she was pulling it away from Stark?

She looked around the room. "Did you happen to notice where my dress from last night might have gone?"

He lay back on the pillow, arms tucked beneath his head, not caring that his fledgling erection was in full view. 

"Nope."

She pulled the sheet the rest of the way around her and stood, making sure to stand as straight as possible so she appeared at her most imposing. 

"I'm going to go take a shower and then clean this nasty taste out of my mouth. Find it. Or call Pepper and tell her I'll need to borrow some of her stuff."

Pepper was at least a size smaller and had less bust to worry about, but Maria didn't care. The look on Stark's face was priceless as his smug expression was quickly replaced by one of panic.

"Pepper?"

"Or find my dress. Your choice," she told him, smirking. "Oh, and Stark? I'm a quick washer. You might want to get a hustle on it."


End file.
